Living With My fate
by mannyfan
Summary: Girls like me didn’t keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.R-Rating maybe later.
1. Default Chapter

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter One: Admitting it to myself**

**I've always loved the saying "Live everyday like it's your last" of course a sorten best friend of mine never understood that. Maybe this year and last she started to understand when her Step-dad Mr. Simpson was diagnosed with Cancer. I wanted to tell her so bad that I understood how she felt and how Mr. Simpson felt but we were at a point in our friendship where I felt like I was pushing her away because I was scared of letting her in on the secret that I'd kept for so long.**

**I stared out my window and watched the rain. I remember doing this when I was little because I was too sick to play with the other kids just like I am today. Emma would come by and ask for me and I'd have my mom make an excuse. Every Summer I'd go to my family doctor in the Philippines and everyone would think It was just a summer visit with my extended family. It's been a daily routine since I found out I was sick, I was seven and I thought I caught the flu. Then later that year I found out it was worst much worst. I had Hepatocellular Carcinoma, a cancer in the Liver but I didn't want to be known as Manny Santos: The Girl** **with cancer, I didn't want people to feel sorry for me and I didn't want to feel sorry for myself. **

**Maybe not telling everyone was better for me for awhile I forgot about it. I forgot that I wouldn't live long enough to see my children graduate, the doctors said it was such a miracle that I lived to fifthteen. That I was so strong to go out and not feel bad for myself and live like a normal fifthteen year old girl. I knew that I wouldn't live that long but I had to live each day like it was my last maybe that's the reason I did some of the things I did though I'm not making excuses. I knew I couldn't have that baby, my grandmother was twenty-five when she had died of Liver Cancer and my mother was only three I didn't want that to happen to my daughter or son and I couldn't do that to Craig especially since I had found out that Craig mother had died of Cancer he had lost so much. I knew having that baby would be wrong and I just couldn't and the risks that were involved were not good either.**

**But when Craig told me that I was basically the biggest mistake he made me felt like I would die right then and there. I know I won't have a chance to find true love that's why I felt like Craig was that even though he'd hurt me time and time again. I think I made most of my decisions on thinking that today could be my last day living, The new look, wanting to be popular and not another face in the crowd, Going after Craig, Having the Abortion , everything . I lived longer than most with a cancer like mines and I'd say It's been a good life but I know my fate and I understand and I hope when I'm gone everyone will understand why I couldn't tell them.**

"**Manuela sweetie are you okay" My mother said coming into my room**

"**Yes I'm fine" I said breaking my glance from the window and now staring at the floor**

"**I know the doctor said…." My mother started but I looked at her not wanting to hear anymore**

**  
"I'm fine" **

"**Well Gavin and Emma have called a couple of times maybe you should give them a call maybe talk to Emma" She said placing her hand on my shoulder**

"**I can't"  
**

"**I understand that Snake has Cancer too she's dealing" **

"**So Emma's dealing with a lot this isn't the right time" **

"**When will be the right time you've hidden this for a long time I think she'd be hurt to know you didn't tell her and maybe it would help you" **

"**I told you I'm fine" I said raising my voice a little**

"**You need to tell her Manuela and what about Gavin" She asked lifting my head up to look at her**

"**They'll find out sooner or later" I said in a near whisper she looked close to tears "I'm tired I'm going to go to bed" Was all I could let out**

"**Alright but maybe…." She started**

"**Goodnight Mami" I said cutting her off**

"**Goodnight baby" My mom said kissing me on my forehead I watched her towards the door**

"**Please turn…"Before I could finish she turned off the lights and I could see her smile gleaming in the dark **

**I looked out the window then got up and climbed into my bed. My cell phone started to vibrate and I just looked at it, Spinner was calling again. I just added it to my other ten missed call today. **

**This is just the first chapter so please give it a chance this story will deal with Manny and her and everyone close to her dealing with her Cancer. Please r&r.**

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	2. Pregnant Again?

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter two: Pregnant Again?**

**Yesterday was hard. I could barely sleep thinking about everything how I was going to deal now that I was sick really sick. My mother's words kept ringing in my head Talk to Emma, and the more I thought about the more it didn't seem like such a bad idea. I opened the doors to Degrassi and it was like as soon as I got there everyone's eyes were glued on me. I looked around and blinked hard "What's going on" was all I could keep thinking. Girls were giving me evil stares and whispering and snickering behind my back this hadn't happen since last year with Craig and my Pregnancy. I was totally clueless. When I finally got to my locker Paige was standing there and she didn't look happy. I rolled my eyes and sighed I just knew something was going on and Paige knew what it was.**

"**Um…Hey Paige" I said **

"**Yeah Hey Manny" She said coldly**

"**So um…what's up?" **

"**You tell me Manny" **

"**What are you talking about" I asked**

"**You know what I'm talking about" She said angrily**

"**No actually I don't If this is about me missing spirit squad yesterday I have a reason I didn't feel well" I said **

"**Yeah I know you were sick everyone knows Manny" She shouted my eyes popped out how could everyone know I mean I hadn't told anyone**

"**How? I mean How could everyone know" I asked**

"**Manny it's kind of obvious you've been missing spirit squad practice, last week you were throwing up, now today look at you, you look like you just woke from the dead your as pale as a zombie" **

"**I know, I know I didn't want everyone to know I can't do anything about it I mean what do you want me to do" I said**

"**Manny your like some kind of freak you know that you just think everyone should feel sorry for you well I don't I'm happy your getting exactly what you deserve" Paige spat at me my eyes widened I knew Paige could be Mean but that had to be the meanest thing she'd ever said to me I could feel my face turn blood red and my throat start to clump up and my eyes watering I just stared at her and before a tear could fall I ran towards the Girls Washroom **

**I ran into a stall and broke down. This is why I didn't want anyone to know no one cared about me they all hated me and wished I was dead but I don't know what I did that was so horrible I mean everyone seemed to be nicer to me this year.**

**I was still crying when finally there was a knock on the stall. I didn't answer it whoever it was I hoped would just go away, but they didn't.**

"**Manny I know your in here I saw you run in here" It was Emma I grabbed some Tissue and whipped my face then opened the door she looked at me disgusted Great she hated me too but how could she I should be disgusted, I was the one with the disease, I was the one that was sick. **

"**Emma why does everyone hate me" I cried out**

"**Manny everyone doesn't hate you but I mean you should have learn from the last time" She said **

"**What? Last time Emma" I asked confused**

"**The last time you got Pregnant by someone else's boyfriend" Emma said to me**

"**What?" **

"**Manny everyone knows that you were sleeping with Spinner while he was dating Paige and now you're Pregnant" **

"**Pregnant? Em I'm not Pregnant" I said a little angry**

"**Manny it's kind of obvious and this time I hope your not going to have an abortion" Emma said **

"**What?! So that's what you think Em I'm not even ready to have sex again, I was to scared to even make-out with Spinner scared it would lead up to sex, do you really think that I'm that easy and that stupid to have sex again and get Pregnant, Huh!" I yelled angrily**

"**So you mean you're not Pregnant" Emma asked**

"**No" I yelled **

"**Manny I'm so sorry I knew I shouldn't have believed Paige but Like I'd been calling you all week to see why you'd been missing school and you didn't call me back so I didn't know what to believe but that's no excuse I'm sorry" She apologized**

"**Em It's just…..I'm…." I wanted so bad to tell Emma but I just couldn't "Well after I broke up with Spinner I've been feeling distant that's all" I lied **

"**Oh it's okay Manny you were too good for him anyway" Emma said pulling me into a hug I felt bad lying to her but I'd been doing it to for nine years**

**Next Chapter: Manny has to make a big decision or else…. Also Emma starts to ask questions.**


	3. Bad News

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Three: Bad News **

**After-school I walked with Emma and we didn't speak a word. I had the worst day possible obviously Paige had let the whole school know in less than one class period and not only did everyone hate me for thinking that Spinner cheated on her with me and that but everyone hated me for getting pregnant again although I wasn't really pregnant. We finally got to the dot and I saw Paige sitting with Hazel, Jimmy, Craig and Ashley I quickly turned away. I couldn't go in there everyone already hated me for something that wasn't true I didn't feel like having Emma find out that I lied to her too besides I had enough drama today.**

"**Emma I should go" I said looking at the door**

"**Why besides I thought you were hungry" She asked **

"**Not hungry enough to face that" I said pointing to Paige's table**

"**Manny don't worry about it I'll set everything straight I promise" Emma said grabbing my hand**

"**No" I Said pulling away "Please Today has been just horrible and I can't deal with anything more just let me go" I pleaded she looked into my eyes and sighed**

"**Alright but I'll just have to get to the bottom of this myself" **

"**Em I know your trying to help but please you'll just make things worst" I Said hoping she'd understand**

"**But Man…" She started looking back**

"**Please just don't okay" I said **

"**Ok" She said **

"**Thanks" I said looking towards the door and when I did I saw Craig staring at Emma and Me I just looked at him for a second and walked away waving one last bye to Emma**

**I really hoped that Emma wouldn't do anything to make things worst than they already were.**

**I walked home slowly trying to take in everything maybe I would understand more of what's happening to me. I decided to take a quick cut through the park and sit on the swings just to think. Something I didn't do much or at least that's what a lot of people would think about me that I never thought about anything But My appearance, Popularity and Boys but that wasn't true but a lot of what people thought of me wasn't true.**

**I think I sat there for a half - hour thinking when someone came from behind me and tapped me. I jumped so high I flew off my swing I guess the reason I didn't hear the person was because I was lost in thought.**

"**Um…I'm really sorry I didn't mean to scare you" Jimmy said rolling over to me and helping me up**

"**Thanks and that's okay" I said smiling I don't looking at Jimmy always made me smile he had this thing about him that just made you smile even when you didn't want to Maybe that was just me or that fact that I had a crush on him since I was in like grade seven**

"**So what brings you here" He asked**

"**Um….Just thinking" I said leaning against the swing pole **

"**Cool That's what I came here for and Oh about you and Spinner and I hold no hard feelings about you hooking up with Spin" He said I still always felt guilty that my boyfriend was the reason he was in a wheelchair that's one of the reasons I'm glad we're almost over **

"**Oh thanks but by Tomorrow their will be no more Spinner and Me" I said sitting down on the ground in front of Jimmy**

"**What? Why that loser doesn't want anything to do with the baby" He asked looking as though he was actually upset **

"**Um…Jimmy don't tell anyone but there isn't any baby" I told him**

"**What do you mean?" **

"**Well everyone just jumped to the conclusion that I was Pregnant but I'm not I haven't even had sex since…well you know" I said he just nodded **

"**Well why don't you want anyone to know you aren't Pregnant shouldn't you want people to know that it isn't true" **

"**It's better than the truth" I said in a whisper not meant for him to hear **

"**Well what's the truth" He asked and I jumped back a little because I didn't think he'd hear me**

"**Why are you so concerned you've only spoken like three sentences to me from grade seven to now so why care now" I asked becoming slightly defensive**

"**I don't know you that well Manny but I'd like to be your friend I mean you can use one now can't you" He asked and I did more than he could ever know**

"**I guess" I said giving him a little smile then my cell phone went off**

"**Hello" I said into the receiver**

"**Manny where are you" It was Emma**

"**Um…I just stopped at the park that's all" I Said she sound worried or something **

"**Well your mom called she said she'd like you to come like right away something about an emergency Is everything okay" I jumped up Damn I forgot I had a Doctor Appointment today he was suppose to give me back the results of my test**

"**Yeah um…I'm fine Thanks bye" I said quickly hanging up**

"**Everything Alright" Jimmy asked**

"**Um…Yeah I just have to get home but thanks for the Talk" I said starting off towards home**

"**Remember what I said" He yelled to me **

**I ran home to see what the emergency was My cell went off again and it was Spinner I Ignored knowing what it was probably about my suppose Pregnancy. When I finally got home I opened the door and mother and father were both sitting on the couch my mom was crying and my dad looked horrible. My mother rushed me with a hug. I had absolutely no idea what was going on but I guess I was about to find out. **

"**Mami what's going on?" **

"**Manuela Honey sit down" My dad said I did as I was told **

"**What's going on" **

"**You were suppose to come home for your Doctor's appointment" My mom choked out**

"**I know and I'm sorry It's just I had a rough day at school and…" But I could finish my dad cut me off**

"**Manuela it's alright we went and sweetie we got some bad news" My mom let out a loud cry then covered her mouth I looked over at her then back to my dad I couldn't help but cry myself**

"**Wha….what's wrong" I asked **

"**The doctor said…Manuela the doctor said that even with if you go through Chemo you'll only have a year to live two if you decided to go through Chemo" My dad said tears now streaming down his face**

"**What!No Please No" I cried **

"**Manuela I'm sorry" My mother said**

"**The Doctor's want to know when will you start Chemo" My dad I didn't see no point in it if I was just going to Die anyway**

"**What's the Point why go through all that Hell For Nothing! I mind as well be dead!" I screamed**

"**No don't say that Manuela we'll get second opinion we'll get a stronger Chemo treatment whatever it takes" My mom cried out holding me I pushed her off **

"**No…No the Hell with Chemo I going to die anyway I'll rather die without the Chemo" I said running up the steps and into my room locking the door**

**I began to cry into my pillow my life was crumbling right underneath me and I had no way of stopping it. **


	4. Why Not?

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Four: Why Not?**

**I don't ever remember crying so hard in my life. I'd cried for at least three hours straight. I think I cried for a little of two hours straight after my abortion but then I guess I cried myself to sleep. But this time I couldn't sleep and I couldn't stop crying. Spinner had called me at least twelve times and ignored him I was getting somewhat annoyed with him. I closed my eyes tight hoping I'll open them and everything will be just a dream that I had just dreamt this whole day. I re-opened my eyes and I still in my bed and my pillow was soaked. **

"**Manuela can we talk" My mother said knocking on the door**

"**Can we please tomorrow I'm really tired" I said **

"**Manuela please I think…." **

"**I DON'T WANT TO TALK OKAY!" I yelled turning over on my bed**

"**Alright but we'll have to talk about this sooner or later" She said and as I heard her footsteps leave I ran to my closet and changed into one of my grade nine outfits when I was labeled as the "The School Slut" and grabbed my coat and climbed out my window I didn't know exactly where I was going but I had to get out of this house. **

**I was now wearing a tiny tight leather mini skirt and a red strapless shirt and red heels. I walked around for a while thinking of where to go I started to walk farther and farther away from Degrassi and Closer into the city. As I was walking I saw Jimmy and Marco in a store across the street. I quickly tried to hide running behind a tree I peeked around and Jimmy and Marco were coming out the Store. I Started across the street trying to catch the bus that just stopped then I looked back and Jimmy was looking straight at me as soon as I saw his mouth open I jumped on the bus. **

**When I finally found a seat in the back I was getting stares from men stares I hadn't gotten since grade nine stares I hadn't wanted since grade nine. I quietly sat in the back when a great looking guy walk towards me. He had dirty-blonde hair, broad shoulders, really tall, blue amazing eyes and he sat right next to me. **

"**Is this seat taking" He asked looking down**

"**N…O… Um No have a seat" I said stumbling a bit**

"**So what's a little girl like you doing out here so late dressed like that" The cute Stranger turned and asked**

"**I'm far from a little girl" I said raising my eye-brow **

"**Is that so" He said**

"**Yes very so" I said**

"**Well How old are you um….sorry didn't catch your name" H asked**

"**Mann….Um Manuela and I'm 16 I'm practically all grown" I said becoming a little my sexy in my tone **

"**Oh well Manuela who's practically grown I'm Nick and where are you off to so late" He asked with a smirk on his face that was adorable **

"**Wherever" I said**

"**And where exactly is wherever" He asked**

"**Why so many questions are you an undercover cop or something" I said a little angrily**

"**No of course not and you wouldn't be doing anything to get yourself in any trouble now would you" He asked **

"**No just going out to have a good time" I said with a little smile**

"**Well Good time is my middle name where you headed" He asked with a wicked smile**

"**Somewhere into town to find like a party or something know any good ones" I asked **

"**Yeah but it's an eighteen or older party so I'll have to sneak you in" He said**

"**Great" **

"**Here's our stop" He said getting up and pulling down the string to stop the bus**

"**Let's go" I exclaimed with a smile **

**When we got off the bus we walked a block down the street when we stopped in front of this club it just looked bad from the outside and I could just hear people fighting over the loud music inside.**

"**You coming Manuela" Nick asked a little ahead of her**

"**Um…Yeah Let's Party" I said a little unsure **


	5. Sick

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Five: Sick**

**Nick walked me through the crowd and I don't think I would have made it through there if he hadn't between the perverts that kept grabbing my butt and the fights I'm surprised I got through it Alive. We finally got to the bar and I found a seat.**

"**So um…Manuela you'll be alright If I leave right" He asked yelling over the loud music**

"**You mean your not going to stay with me" I asked **

"**I thought you understood I was just going to get you in besides you're a big girl right you can take care of yourself" He said flashing me a smile and disappearing into the crowd**

"**So what will it be cutie" The bar-tender asked**

"**Oh I can't…" I started**

"**Two Martinis on me" A voice behind said I turned around and saw a guy with short Black hair and a short kind of a beard but despite that he looked kind of young maybe like a college student or something. **

"**Um…Do I know you" I asked smiling**

"**Maybe I should introduce myself" He said taking a seat next to me**

"**Yeah that would help"**

"**Well my name is Dustin but most people call me Dusty" He said smiling "And as for the question of do you know me no but I know you remember a couple years back my High school Basketball team played against yours, You still go to Degrassi right" **

"**Yeah Sorry but I don't remember you" I apologized "What school did you go to" **

"**Bardell" He said smiling **

"**Oh uh Bardell I only one guy from there Dean" **

"**Oh Dean yeah I remember him" **

"**Two Martinis" The bar-tender said placing the drinks down**

"**Here you go um…I didn't catch your name" **

"**I didn't throw it" I said grabbing the drink and looking at it for a second thinking whether or not to drink it**

"**Drink up" He smiled I decided to just suck it up and just have one .Soon One led to two and two led to six. **

"**Okay.. uh…Rusty….I…Mean…Dusty my name is Nanny" I said laughing and falling all over the place in the club**

"**Your name is Nanny" He said trying to hold me up**

"**No silly my name is Manny not Nanny" I laughed**

"**Let's dance" I said throwing my hands in the arms and jumping around **

"**Uh…Manny are you feeling okay" He asked over the music**

"**No actually I'm sick you know like sick sick" I said laughing**

"**It's probably all the Martinis you had" He said laughing and walking me towards the back of the club**

"**No stupid like Sick sick you know sick" I said pushing him lightly **

"**Yeah Manny I know Sick" He said as we started into this dark private room**

"**OH! We get V.I.T. treatment" I started laughing more and more**

"**You mean V.I.P. and yeah this is really private so private anything that happens doesn't leave this room" As he said this things started to get blurry **

"**What uh..What did you say Dusty" I asked **

"**I said shut up okay I don't want to hurt you so shut up" He said pushing me down on one of the couches hard**

"**Wait uh…..Dusty what are you doing" I said getting a little scared as he started to walk closer and closer to me **

"**Just shut up" He said climbing on top of me **

"**Wait No don't please" I cried my vision getting worst he didn't listen he just pushed down harder then he ripped my shirt off and I totally blacked out for about five minutes. I woke up he was still on top of me this time I tried to fight harder to push him off he was still unzipping his pants. **

"**Please Dusty don't" I begged**

"**Manny listen just shut up this will be over soon" He said angrily I used all my strength to try to push off and it wasn't strong enough and he had already unzipped his pants and pulling down his boxers I just closed my eyes tight then I heard the sound of the club flood the room and I opened my eyes and the door was open and there stood what looked like the guy from the bus his name escaped me now. **

"**Here she…….." He started pointing to me with someone next to him Dusty quickly jumped off me and I saw Mr.Simpson and Spike standing I had no idea what they were doing there but I was so happy**

**Spike quickly ran over to me.**

"**Oh Manny baby" She said crying as if I was Emma holding me tight **

"**I didn't want to I'm sorry I didn't want to" Was all I could say I still could barely see**

"**I know baby it's okay it's okay" She said rocking me back and forth Mr.Simpson caught Dusty just as he tried to escape**

"**If you touched one hair on her hand I swear I'll…." Mr. Simpson said holding Dusty up against a wall by his collar **

"**Snake let's just get her out of here she doesn't look to good" Spike cut in **

"**Fine" He said not breaking his glance from Dusty**

**Mrs. Nelson picked me giving me her jacket and began walking me out.**

"**How did you know I was here" I asked as we got outside then I looked up and saw Jimmy and Emma standing there**

"**He said he saw you getting on a bus and decided to follow so when he got into the city he called us cause he didn't know your parents number" Snake Explained**

"**Oh uh…I don't feel to good" I said just before I puked on the sidewalk**

"**Oh god Manny" Emma said disgusted **

"**Emma…it's been a long night" Spike cut in**

"**Yeah whatever" Emma said rolling her eyes**

"**Em I'm sorry" I said **

"**Yeah that you are sorry" Emma spat at me**

"**Emma!" Spike yelled**

"**Uh..Manny are you okay you could've got yourself killed or even…." Jimmy said **

"**I'm uh…" I started but soon puked again**

"**Look at you we should have just left you here I thought this year you'd be different but your just the same you had everyone worried while you were down here getting drunk and doing god knows what" **

"**Well I'm sorry okay besides I didn't need you or some boy in a wheelchair who hasn't spoken more than three sentences to me to come to my rescue I can take of myself" I yelled **

"**Manny.." Mr. Simpson said looking down at Jimmy who looked hurt **

"**No Dad don't that's all Manny is selfish doesn't think about anyone but herself she's more like Pathetic" She screamed I was so close to yelling back but I felt a sharp pain in my side I felt like I was about to faint**

"**Manny are you okay" Jimmy said rolling over to me**

"**I don't know I think I need to get to a Hospital" I said grabbing my side**

"**Oh Manny Please it's just what it feels like to be Drun.." Before she could finish I started throwing up blood and passed out**


	6. I'll keep your secret

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Six: I'll keep your secrets **

**When I opened my eyes the sun hit me like a ray beam. I quickly covered my eyes and groaned realizing last night wasn't just a bad dream. **

"**Urgh!" I said tiredly**

"**Oh My god Manny your okay" Emma said rushing to my bed "I'm sorry I was so mean to you last night Manny I'm just glad you're okay" **

"**Where's Jimmy" I asked **

"**He left his parents came last night to pick him up" She said "I was so scared that something had happened to you especially after I acted like a jerk to you" **

"**Well I'll be blind if you don't close those shades" **

"**I opened them Manuela to give this room some sunshine" My mother said rising from her seat in the corner she sound upset and she had every right to be "Emma can you give me and Manuela a second" **

"**Yes Mrs. Santos I'll go get something to eat want anything" Emma asked**

"**No" I said Emma turned and walked out the room my mother followed behind closing the door half-way behind**

"**Manuela! How could be so stupid you know better than to run away and go to an adult club" My mother shouted giving me a worst headache than I already had**

"**Mami..My head" I said weakly **

"**And Manuela Alcohol you know at your age you shouldn't be drinking especially with your condition I mean Manuela the Doctors said that if you would have drunk anymore you could have died because of the Hepatocellular Carcinoma and you should start Chemo right away" She said lighting her tone **

"**Mami I told you already I'm not going through Chemo!" I screamed my eyes watering "Oh my god" I heard a loud scream outside my door I looked up and saw Emma Tears streaming down her face **

"**You have Can….c.er Manny" She said crying my mother just looked at me and got up from her seat to leave us alone**

"**Yes" I said in a near whisper looking away from her not standing to see her cry**

"**When….How?" She said stumbling over her words **

"**Emma that's not important" I said quietly**

"**Manny Please talk to me" She said crying harder**

"**Emma I can't just forget it" I yelled**

"**What! How can I just forget my best friend has Cancer Manny it's impossible so talk to me" She screamed back **

"**Okay What Emma, what do you want me to say" I yelled back a little more quietly and for the first time looking at her **

"**Just talk to me did you just find out about this" She asked sitting down next to me**

"**Not exactly"**

"**What do you mean not exactly how long have you've known" She asked **

"**Nine Years okay" **

"**What No…Manny you kept this from for nine years" **

"**I was scared okay Emma I didn't want people to know scared they might treat me different because I had cancer and how I could I tell you nowadays you were going through so much I just didn't want to throw nothing else your way" I said **

"**Manny I love you through everything even our arguments your still my best friend and I'd always be there for you no matter what I'm going through you could always get through things together" She said tearing up again "I promise I'll be there for you through Chemo" I looked away starting to tear up myself**

"**What did I say I mean you are going to go through Chemo therapy you have to" She said looking lost**

"**Emma There's no point okay I'm not doing Chemo therapy" I said tears streaming down my cheek**

"**What do you mean there's no point you mean it's not that serious that you have to go through Chemo I mean have you done your Chemo already that you don't have to do it" **

"**No Emma I'm not doing it Period" **

"**But Why Chemo is to help you" She now crying herself**

"**Emma Chemo can't help the doctors said that even if I go through Chemo I'll only have two years to live one if I don't"  
**

"**No get a second opinion go to Snake's Doctor I'll go call him" She said pulling out her cell-phone**

"**Emma no Okay you have to promise not to tell anyone please" I pleaded**

"**But Manny…" **

"**No Emma Please you can't tell anyone I can't deal with everyone treating me like I'm some freak" I interrupted**

"**It's better than people thinking you're a slut" **

"**I don't care about that just please" I chocked out**

**Emma swallowed hard and whipped her tears away. "Alright I promise" **


	7. Friends

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Seven: Friends**

**I sat on the edge of my bed staring into the mirror. Friday was horrible never thought so much could go wrong in one night I still shake a little at the thought of what if Mr. Simpson and Spike hadn't come in that room. But Most important finally telling Emma I had Cancer it's taken me so long and I know she's hurt that I didn't tell her before I just hope she didn't tell anyone. I mean I know Emma and I know how she is, she has her own mind and she does what she thinks is best in a situation but she doesn't really think about what's good for the Person in that situation. **

"**Manuela are you okay, you can stay home from school today I'll jus..." My mother said coming into my room ready to drive me in**

"**Yeah I'm ready mami" I said glancing into the mirror one more time and grabbing my backpack**

**The ride to school was pretty quiet as we got closer to the school thoughts of Jimmy flooded my mind I hadn't spoken to him since I was mean to him Friday. Even after all he did I was still so selfish. The car stopped and I looked at the school and took a deep breath and stepped out waving good-bye to my mother feeling like a toddler wanting to grab onto my mother's ankle never letting go until she dragged me into school.**

**I walked in and the vibe in school just felt different it as if all eyes could right through me and never everything I was going through though I tried to put on my best act. I walked down the hall hoping to see Jimmy and not to see him at the same time. If I did see him I could apologize but what if after what I said he never wanted to speak to me. I was so lost in thought that I bumped into something hard like metal or something, I looked down and saw it was Jimmy and I had knocked his books out his hand. Nice Santos great way to apologize. **

"**Oh I'm so sorry Jimmy" I said bending down to pick up his books**

"**Don't okay I can get it myself" He said a little bitterly **

"**No let me I'm sorry" I said picking up a book**

"**NO! I can do it myself Okay" He screamed causing me to jump and drop the book I looked at him and at the students who were now staring at Jimmy as if he had gone crazy and started to walk away. "I knew it he hates me" I said to myself but when I got about two inches away Jimmy called out to me**

"**Manny wait okay I'm sorry" He said rolling over to me I moved back and sat down on the foyer steps "Listen Manny I didn't mean to scream at you" **

"**No I deserve after the way I treated you" I said feeling guilty and ashamed all over again "No this has nothing to do with Friday I just don't like people feeling that if a book falls or I can't reach something they have to rush over to me like I'm an infant I hate that people pity and baby me I mean my own girlfriend does it" Jimmy complained to me and for a second I thought I almost say a tear fall down "I just wish I could make all this go away" He said as if I could relate though I could it's like he knew something**

"**Why are you telling me all this I mean not that I don't like talking to you it's just why not Craig, why not Ashley or Marco why me?" I asked **

"**Because when I was talking to you that day in the park I don't know I just thought you could relate not in the same way but just you know understand where I was coming from never mind" He said starting to wheel away**

"**I do understand where you're coming from but just why me and why not someone closer to you" **

"**After the shooting I realized that everyone needs someone and when I heard that rumor about you being Pregnant and everything I thought you could use a friend but even after you told me it wasn't true something told me you still needed a friend" Jimmy said stopping **

"**Yeah I can use a friend now but it seems like even you Mr. Popularity could use one too" I said smiling lightly**

"**Yeah I can even me Mr. Popularity" He said smiling back**

"**Alright Friends?" I said holding out my hand**

"**Friends" He said shaking my hand**

**Then someone shadowed over us and Jimmy mad and angry face I quickly turned around and saw Spinner. **

"Um…Jimmy can you excuse us Please" He asked quietly Jimmy just looked at him angrily then looked at me

"**It's okay Jimmy I'll see you later okay" **

"**Alright" He said wheeling off I watched him until he went all the way down the hall**


	8. Everyone's Aganist me

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Eight: Everyone's against me**

**I stared at Spinner blankly waiting to see what he actually wanted from me. I thought he would get the hint that I didn't want to have anything to do with him. Besides he shouldn't even be in the school. **

"**Okay Talk" He finally spoke**

"**What do you mean you're the one who needs to talk" I said confused as to what he wanted me to say**

"**Manny don't play games so you go slutting around my back and get yourself pregnant and you try and put it on me" He said angrily **

"**What!" I said**

"**Yeah I know I lied and told a couple of guys that we were messing around but if I knew you were going to go and and get yourself pregnant for the second time I would have never even hooked up with you" **

**I looked at him disgustingly he was the biggest loser I've dated.**

"**So what this whole relationship was so you could spread rumors to say you did such and such with me to add on to the negative things people think of me, cause you do know that everyone thinks that I started sleeping with you when you were still dating Paige so she hates me so I think I'm the one who should be regretting hooking up with you not to mention what you did to Jimmy"**

"**Oh so what is he the father did you sleep with him I mean you've always like sleeping with other people's boyfriends looks like you guys are pretty chummy you know Santos you really need to learn to keep you're legs close hope this trip to the clinic is more fun" He said harshly I flinched a little it was so hurtful I mean I knew he was a Loser but I didn't know he could be that mean My heart started pounding and my throat clumped up **

"**Get out my face" I said pushing past him he couldn't let him see me cry**

"**Yeah whatever Manny save the tears till after the Abortion" I heard him yell after me I started running as fast as I could getting questioning looks I ran to the Girls Washroom and ran to the sink breathing heavily I looked at myself in the mirror and looked at myself I looked horrible my life was falling apart and I had only two people who were willing to be there for me. **

**I heard a roar of students outside the washroom as if there was a big crowd outside and something big was going on. I splashed some water on my face and walked out, there was a huge group of students surrounding my locker I was afraid to look and see what was going on. I slowly made my way through the crowd. When I got to my Locker I started Bawling in red Lipstick "MANNY SANTOS IS A SLUT" was written on my locker with a Baby Doll hanging from my locker. **

"**Who did this! Huh who's the loser that did this" I heard someone screaming**

"**Yeah it's not funny okay whoever did this is really immature and needs to get a life" I recognized the voices as Emma and Jimmy but my head was pounding and my heart was beating a thousands miles per hour and I felt like I could breathe I fell to the floor and my nose started to bleed crazily.**

**Emma fell to the floor next to me. **

"**Someone get the nurse please Go" She screamed holding my head on her lap**


	9. Make my day a little Brighter

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Nine: Make my day a little brighter **

**After the Nurse let me go I hid in the Foyer until Lunch. I can't believe I chose this over going home before the nurse let me go she called my mom and my mom asked me if I wanted to come home and go to the doctor's office I said no I couldn't handle any more bad news But I knew she make me go after school anyway. I had to change into my Panthers sweater since my other shirt was ruined. **

"**Manny Oh my god I was so worried" Emma screamed running over to me **

"**Oh hey Em sorry I didn't mean to worry you" I said staring at nothing in particular but just staring off**

"**So what happened are you okay" She asked**

"**Yeah I'm fine just a little nose bleed" I said playing with my hands**

"**Manny don't down play it for me it wasn't just a little nose bleed Manny there was blood everywhere it's because of your Cancer isn't it" I looked up at her and looked around quickly like their was people all around but I couldn't take chances**

"**Emma Please not here" I said in a near whisper**

"**Then where Manny you never want to talk about it but you have to you care more about what people think of you then…..then your life" She yelled**

"**Yeah and Emma what else do I have huh when your like me that's all you have left what people think of you cause when I die.." I started but Emma cut in**

"**If you die Manny you don't have to give up because if you really care what people think of you they'll think Manny Santos the girl that gave up on life which is pretty pathetic" She said with a tears in her eyes**

"**Em can we just stop talking about this please" I said not willing to challenge her**

"**Manny it's just…..Never mind come on we're already late for lunch" She said getting up**

"**Em I don't know about…" I started**

"**Oh no you're coming to lunch besides you have to eat to keep your strength up" She said grabbing my arm**

"**Okay Mom" I Said with a little smirk**

"**Besides Jimmy seemed a little weird about you" Emma said giving me a "What's that all about look"**

"**Whatever we're just friend besides he's with Hazel" I said walking out the foyer with Emma**

"**Hey Manny" Someone called from behind me**

"**Em Please tell me that isn't who I think it is" I sighed**

"**Just keep walking Manny come on" She said pulling on my arm so I called walk faster but I could hear the person start to run towards us yelling for me to stop**

"**What do you want Craig" I said stopping and turning around inches away from him**

"**Can we talk Manny please" He asked**

"**Actually Craig we were on our way to Lunch" Emma cut in**

"**Please Em I just need to talk to Manny for a minute" Craig Pleaded**

"**Craig…."**

"**Em give us a minute It'll only be a second" I Said **

**Emma looked at me and then to Craig and sighed.**

"**I'll be right here" She said putting her hands on her hip **

"**Alright thanks Em" Craig said pulling me to the side**

"**What do you want Craig" I asked again**

"**Calm down I'm not hear to bring you trouble or to cause you grief I just wanted to see if you were okay" **

"**I'm fine Craig not that you would really care" **

"**I do care Manny really and I always will I was really worried when I heard about what happened" He said putting a hand on my shoulder**

"**Why no one else does" **

"**Sure they do people just feel for Paige that's all" **

"**Yeah I know everyone feels for Paige but no one cares about the truth" I said looking away from Craig**

"**Well what's the truth then" **

"**Just forget it okay I'm fine that's all you wanted to know so you can leave now" I said turning to walk away **

"**Manny wait" He said grabbing my arm**

"**What" I asked sighing**

"**You and Jimmy you guys aren't ….you know because Hazel is a nice girl and she doesn't deserve that" **

"**So am I Craig and I wouldn't do that to her she's my friend or at least civil to me" **

"**So was Paige and Ashley" Craig said before walking away I couldn't believe he said that he was just like everyone else how could everyone hate me**

"**Manny are you okay" Emma said looking at me I was close to bursting into tears but I sucked it in**

"**Yeah I'm fine" I said taking a deep breath and walking into the cafeteria as soon as I entered all eyes were on me and people started snickering and talking I felt like running back out but I just went on line with Emma behind me and got my lunch and sat down Emma began chatting off about what I missed in class I stared out the window It was raining today day was so gloomy . **

**I looked away from the window and looked at Emma who was smiling and talking I smiled back and kept nodding and l looked away again and Saw Jimmy he smiled at me and for awhile for that second Today didn't seem so bad as corny as that sounded he made it a little brighter it felt good to be a little corny again. **


	10. Jimmy's Anger

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Ten: Jimmy's Problem**

**After the final bell rung I grabbed my bags and walked to my locker where the um… "Graffiti" was painted over during third period. **

"**So Manny feeling better" A voice said from behind me**

"**Yeah I'm fine" I said turning around to Jimmy**

"**Oh good I was worried" He said flashing me one of his famous smiles**

"**Jimmy Brooks I'll have to say that Hazel is one of the luckiest girls in the world" I said flashing him a smile myself**

"**Yeah well any guy would be the Luckiest guy on earth to be with you Manny and don't forget it" He said with a sound of seriousness in his voice**

"**Yeah well right now me being the School Slut again I'm sure they wouldn't" I said looking down**

"**Manny I can't understand why you won't let me tell everyone the truth I mean I hate hearing people talk about you that way your really sweet" He said frowning**

"**I know but you can't tell anyone you just can't I can't explain now but please you just can't" I said panicking a little that he was growing and ready to tell that I wasn't really pregnant **

"**I won't trust me I won't I'm just saying I feel bad that's all" **

"**Well thanks but here comes…" Before I could finish she was already standing in front of us "Hey Hazel" I smiled**

"**Yeah hey Manny oh and I heard about this morning are you okay" She said sounding a little phony **

"**Yeah I'm fine"**

"**Well that's good I can't believe someone would do that" She said flashing me a fake sympathetic look**

"**Haze let's just go alright" Jimmy cut in probably seeing how phony Hazel was**

"**Alright bye Manny have a good day" She said sounding so evil**

"**Bye Manny I'll talk to you later" He said wheeling away I stared as Jimmy and Hazel left and right as I was about to turn around Hazel gave me a glare and looked at Jimmy protectively obviously Spinner and Craig wasn't the only people who thought me and Jimmy were more than friends.**

"**What was all that about" Emma said walking up to my locker**

"**Just another piece of my life going down the tubes I doubt me and Hazel are still friends" **

"**Manny you should have figured that I mean Hazel's like Paige's little puppy and like they say dogs are always loyal" Emma said rolling her eyes**

"**Yeah well Paige has a lot dogs in this school because it seems like everyone hates me" I said opening my locker**

"**Maybe if you told everyone the truth then…" Emma started but I cut her off with a cold glare**

"**Em let's just go and forget about it"**

"**Alright we can go shopping" Emma said shopping that I loved to do shop, shop, shop**

"**That's cool" I said grinning **

"**Alright well let's go" Emma said and returned we were actually acting the way we did before everything in my life got so complicated **

**I think we shopped for about two hours before we both got tired and decided to sit down in the food court. We was laughing and joking like old times and for that time with her I forgot about everything. I looked around at the people seeing how perfectly healthy they looked and how I everything would be like when I was….Before I could even finish my complete thought there was a loud crash. I looked over quickly and it was Jimmy he had knocked a stand over with wheelchair people were staring and some snickering at Jimmy I knew how he felt well not entirely but to a point yeah. Jimmy looked around and started to pick it up but the Lady told him no he looked so embarrassed he quickly looked around and wheeled away.**

"**Poor Jimmy" Emma spoke **

"**Yeah I know I feel so bad" I said looking down at my food "Um…ready to go" I asked**

"**Yeah" She spoke up picking up her bags**

**After I left Emma I sat in my room staring out my window it was raining again. That was spring for you. I couldn't help thinking about Jimmy he looked so hurt and embarrassed he didn't deserve that he was too good of a person. I ran to my closet and found a Degrassi Team Number and Address book where everyone from the Basketball players to the Cheerleaders to the Hockey Players put their number and Address in to get in touch with each other.**

"**Jimmy. Jimmy…Here it is Jimmy Brooks 32 Smith st" I looked at the clock it was only six maybe I should see how he was doing I ran down the steps and left my mother a note telling her where I was going**

**I knew it was raining so I brought my umbrella but it was still really cold but something in me didn't care all I cared about was getting to Jimmy. It's not so bad that I cared about is it I mean he was a friend that's all….**

**I finally got there to a huge building I walked up the steps into the building and towards the elevator. I searched for the floor to press but I drew a blank I thought hard and remembered he had lived in the pent house so I pressed the highest floor with the p next to it. **

**It looked like something off TV. Like a star could live here it was way too good for me and I haven't even seen the inside yet. Music was blasting I don't know why but as soon as I lifted my hand to knock my heart started to race and I began to sweat a little. I knocked twice and there was no answer but the door cracked open I don't know if I should have but against my better judgment I opened the door and walked in. **

**I walked around exploring the apartment I was so scared that if his parents were home I'd be like arrested or something but they weren't home a common thing I've heard. I walked up to this door that said "Do not disturb" on it and was blasting music maybe I could tell Jimmy I couldn't read. I cracked the door a little and saw Jimmy struggling to work-out he was on one of those Balancers that help people learn how to walk again. He looked so tired and weak I felt so bad he didn't even make it one step before falling. I saw the anger in his eyes I opened the door a little wider to help him up when he picked up a weight and throw it at the wall punching a hole through it. I screamed from impact and tried to cover my mouth but he turned and saw me standing there.**

"**Manny what are you doing here!" He screamed I began to speak but he looked mad at me I knew this was a bad idea Jimmy grabbed his wheelchair closer to him and climbed in I backed away slowly I quickly started for the door**

"**Manny Wait" Jimmy screamed from behind me I was right at the door the music was off now **

"**Jimmy listen I'm sorry if I caught you at a bad time I just wanted to see how you were doing with that scene at the mall and all" I said turning around hoping he wouldn't be mad**

"**Yeah um….it's okay I'm use to it by now but I'm really sorry I yelled at you and you had to see me get so frustrated" He said with a little smirk**

"**Oh it's okay I thought you were mad at me or something because I did like just come in uninvited" I said closing the door**

"**No it's okay"**

"**So why were you so mad it's going to take some time you know?"**

"**I know, I know it's just I'm tired of people feeling sorry for me" He said wheeling over to the couch as I followed taking a seat**

"**No one feels sorry Jimmy we feel bad but we don't pity you" **

"**Yeah sure in school you'd think I was infant and Haze she's great but she treats like a kid instead of her boyfriend, my own friends don't even know how to act around me" Jimmy said for a second I thought he would cry but he just stared blankly at the floor **

"**Well I still see you the same way" I said giving him a smile hoping it would make him feel better he just looked up and smiled**

"**Manny you have anyway to be tonight" He asked**

"**No"**

"**How about you stay here and we'll watch some movies it can get kind of lonely around here sometimes" He said with pleading eyes and I really couldn't turn him down after that**

"**Okay" I said smiling back **


	11. A Promise Not Kept

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Twelve: I Promise Not Kept**

**I can't believe I overslept over Jimmy's house the last thing I remembered was us watching "Napoleon Dynamite" and then that's it I got in the house around about like 2 a.m. I had to sneak in through my window. I hope Jimmy got the letter I left him. He was so sweet to me yesterday we talked about so much I almost told him about….**

"**Manny what's the answer" I shook my head and looked up Mr. Simpson looked at me and shook his head**

"**Next time pay attention Ms. Santos"**

"**Sorry Mr. Simpson" The bell rung and I gathered my things and walked out of class**

"**Manny wait up" I could hear Emma yelling from behind me I turned around and bumped straight into Ashley**

"**Sor…Oh wait its Manny Slutos never mind" She said kicking one of books that had fallen I rolled my eyes and sighed I bent down to pick up my books**

"**Forget about her Manny" Emma said helping me pick up my books**

"**Whatever I'm use to it everyone hates for the second year in a row"**

"**Not everyone hates you let's just go before we're late for gym" As I got up to stand I felt a sharp pain in my side **

"**Shit" I said grabbing my side **

"**Manny what's wrong do you need the nurse?" **

"**No I'm fine let's go Mr. Armstrong will kill us if we're late again" I said brushing the throbbing pain in my side off**

"**Manny are you sure you don't look so…." I quickly cut her off**

"**Em I'm fine let's go"**

"**Alright" Emma said sighing staring at me as if I was a sick puppy about to be put under.**

**After Gym in the locker room**

**It seemed like today gym was so hard I kept running short of breath and the pain in my stomach kept getting worst. I waited till everyone left the locker room to get change I didn't want them to see the scars I was starting to get on my stomach. I felt that sharp pain in my stomach and cringed running over to one of the stalls. This is worst then when I was pregnant now all I do is throw up blood 24/7. **

"**Manny I think you need to get some help" I heard Emma say on the other side of the stall**

"**Em I know, I know sometimes I just can't wait till its ove…"**

"**Manny don't okay I mean help like Chemo" I opened up the stall and looked at her**

"**Em I can't you wouldn't understand" I said shouting **

"**But you're not thinking about anyone but yourself not how this is affecting anyone sometimes I can't even sleep thinking with if something happens to you and what about your parents I think your being so selfish" Emma screamed back in tears I opened my mouth but not a word came out only tears flowed down my cheeks **

"**What are you two yelling about" I heard a voice yell Inside in was Mr. Simpson **

"**Come in Dad no one's in here" Emma yelled in Mr. Simpson came in looking at us confused**

"**Em are you okay you we're suppose to meet me upstairs ten minutes ago Liberty told me you we're down here and why are you two crying" **

"**I just never thought a person could be so selfish as if to let not only herself suffer but the people who love her most suffer too" **

"**What do you mean, what's going on?" Mr. Simpson asked Emma looked at me and closed her eyes and blinked back some tears**

"**I can't take it anymore Manny" She screamed I looked at her in horror I prayed she wouldn't tell **

"**Emma you promised" I yelled **

"**Yeah well I can't I just can't Dad Please tell Manny she should go through Chemo she's really sick with Liver Cancer and the doctors said she'll die soon but tell her if she goes through chemo there's a chance she'll survive dad tell her please tell her" Emma said in tears Mr. Simpson eyes grew wide and I looked at Emma with tears in my eyes **

"**You see why I didn't tell you earlier" I said running and pushing past them how could Emma do this to me**


	12. Hate and Help

**Living with my Fate**

**Summary: Girls like me didn't keep secrets like this. I could never keep a secret longer than a day so everyone might be a little more than surprised that I kept a secret like this for more than nine years.**

**Chapter Thirteen: Hate and Help**

**I closed my eyes and sat in the Zen Garden quietly that was slowly becoming my hide out. I couldn't believe Emma had really just done that why was she trying to ruin my life just like everyone else. **

"**Manny what the hell are you trying to pull" I heard someone scream I opened my eyes to see no other than Hazel, Paige, Ellie and Ashley in front of me**

"**Well Hun, Hazel asked you a question" Paige hissed**

"**What are you talking about" I asked **

"**Oh don't play stupid Manny we all know you spent the night over at Jimmy's" Ellie chewed in I grew silent**

"**Well what do you have to say" Hazel asked screaming it's like they were all pulling me in different directions**

"**Nothing I don't have time for this I have a headache" I said getting up pushing past all them and walking into the hallway**

"**Manny your going to talk and your going to talk now" Hazel said grabbing my arm and slamming me against the locker really hard everyone including me looked and Hazel shocked no one had ever seen Hazel get so mad before**

"**Haze take it easy she's pregnant" I heard Ash say**

"**So why should I care she doesn't care I mean she probably going to get another abortion so she can sleep with any other guy she damn well pleases" She spat at me it really hurt before I knew it I let a tear roll down "Oh Please save your damn tears WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT JIMMY'S" She screamed**

"**Um…Haze just come on she doesn't look to good" Paige said coming and grabbing her off of me **

"**I don't care" She said screaming and trying to get away from her**

"**Just come we've got something for her" Ashley said as they walked away looking at me so evilly **

**  
**

**After they were gone I just slid down a locker and started to bawl I couldn't take this anymore my life was over for the little time I had on earth it was going to be Hell maybe getting it over with wouldn't be so bad after all. I heard footsteps coming from down the hallway I got up quickly what if it was someone else ready to chew me out what if it was Hazel again. I began down the hall when I ran into Mr. Simpson I looked up at him and he pulled me into a class.**

"**Manny are okay" He said handing me a tissue **

"**Yeah I'm fine…..considering Emma just ruined my life along with everyone else" **

"**Well I can't help you with everyone else but Emma she never meant to hurt she was only trying to do what's best" He said walking over to me**

"**What was best was for her to keep her mouth close" I said **

"**But Manny just looking at you, you're getting worst you look very fragile like if someone were to touch you would break" He said looking at me I didn't want to meet his glaze so I looked down "Manny do you know what people think" He asked "They think your pregnant"**

"**Of course I know what people think Mr. Simpson trust me people have made it very well known what they think of me" I Said still not looking up and letting a fresh tear roll down my cheek **

"**Emma and I both know it isn't true so why don't you want the rest of the school to know they'll find out anyway" **

"**Mr. Simpson do you know how people would see me if they knew I had Cancer they would see me as a Disability, "There's Manny the girl with Cancer" "Oh Manny Santos Yeah she has Cancer" I don't want people to see me like that I don't want people to pity me like that" I said **

"**Manny that's how I felt at first but yeah people are going to pity you but you'll soon find out the person who's pitting you the most is you" He said lifting my head up to make eye contact with me I just looked away without saying away "Okay Manny whatever you don't want anyone to know Emma also told me you won't go through Chemo Manny chemo is the only chance there is to live"**

"**Emma is just the regular New York Times isn't she" I said he giggled then looked back at me**

"**Manny why won't you go through Chemo" He asked again**

"**The doctor said I would only have……."I started but he cut me off**

"**One year to live if you don't take chemo two if you do Emma told me Listen you're a strong girl I can see it in your eyes and if you believe that your just how do you kids say it these days um….punking out Manny you could get a second opinion trust me Manny doctors aren't always right" He said touching my shoulder**

"**Well what if I want them to be right" I said just as the bell rung Mr. Simpson looked at me as if I was crazy "I have to go to class" I said grabbing my bag and heading for the door as students started pouring into the hallway **

"**Manny come over today for dinner your mom said it was okay just please come we miss having you I know Emma would love to have you" Mr. Simpson yelled out to me**

"**I….I'll try to make it" I said lying knowing I wasn't coming I walked out of class when I saw Craig coming straight towards I turned the other way and tried to make my way through the students I could hear him calling my name I quickly ducked into Mr. Armstrong class right on time I could see Craig through the Glass window looking in**

**I turned around to see Emma looking at me. I sighed and sat down next to her she looked kind of sad that I didn't say anything to her. All I could do was look over at her she looked at me hopeful I just gave her a little smile and she smiled back. Maybe Dinner at the Simpson-Nelsons wouldn't be so bad………..**

**End of Chapter: Sorry I haven't up-dated in awhile I was busy with the ending of school and just relaxing but I missed my sorry so I'll be updating more now. Hope you liked this chapter. But later on in the Story you'll another Character Struggle with their Fate or what could be their fate and…..yes it's who you think it is.**


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